Thorburn Family

10 weeks has flown by… but we almost can’t remember what life was like before Benjamin arrived home.  We remember the first time we met him at his school.  A long line of children.. our first glimpse…Benjamin was the last one.. and the smallest… his backpack seemed as big as he!  As we got face to face, he was jumping up and down, all smiles and giggling.. “This is your new Mommy and Daddy,” his worker Mary said..  it was truly a precious meeting.  He turned around and told a whole bunch of people coming up that “this is my new Mommy and Daddy!!!”   He was (and is) a beautiful picture of big, brown eyes and perfect, tiny hands..

In the last 10 weeks, Benjamin has had tons of medical testing… all clear except for some indication that he has hidden allergies.   He’ll be tested for some more specific items soon.  There seems to be no indication that his smallness is due to a metabolic disorder or other problem.  In October, we meet with his Neurodevelopmentalist for his first evaluation & program to address some developmental delays.  However, we already see improvement in speech and other areas.  He’s a lot like Jubilee was.. give him the right day to day activities, structure and attention, sleep and nutrition, and his development will probably come along at lightning speed.

Our boy of 100 smiles a day loves just about everything.. except baths..but that is getting better. :^) Benjamin is crazy about dancing and singing.  When he came, we used to say, “this is a child who LOVES to sing but seems to know NO songs..”  So he would go around making singing noises with no words.. quite interesting, kind of sad…  Of course, we got right on that, and started teaching him songs & hymns.  Loves to wrestle with Daddy and Jesse.. he’s pretty tough!    Loves books!  He’s got SIX people who want to read to him all day!  Benjamin loves to “argue” about who loves who (video of that coming soon!).  He has an awesome sense of humor, and even gets dry humor and subtleties.  He is always surprising us, and keeps us laughing.   Benjamin loves to help Jesse.  He loves to try to help stack wood and do things in the yard for Daddy.  Jesse is a great big brother and they’d be joined at the hip 24/7 if Ben had his choice.  

As far as behavior, there’s been huge progress!  No more “huffs,” with little crossed arms and stomping feet(!!), no more tantrums, no more food issues.  Though we are aware that he isn’t crazy about every food on earth, he no longer expresses his dislike inappropriately.   He sits well through church and other gatherings and gets comfortable on a snuggly lap.  There’s been much progress in the area of telling the truth.  We are still working on many things, and we imagine that, like the rest of us , he will remain far from perfect and “a work in progress.”  We love him so much…and like each precious child under our roof, it is a privilege and real JOY to raise them for God’s honor and glory.

Benjamin’s day to day life consists of his immediate family, and just about nothing else (yet).  We have many people in our life — we visit people and have people visiting us often — but a member of his immediate family is always available and present with Benjamin wherever we are (no exceptions yet).  Bonding, attachment, family identity.. for Benjamin and for every member of our family towards him, are some of our priorities for now, and we believe those are key ingredients –among others– in the foundation we are trying to set for the years to come.  Sometimes I feel like the African moms who strap their babies to their chest 24/7!!  I love it, though.  I feel like I am truly enjoying and reveling in my “new baby,” and it’s a great blessing to see how relaxed, engaging, and affectionate Benjamin’s response is towards us. By God’s grace, we think that mega-bonding –both ways– has happened and continues to happen.  Keeping him with us is only one of many intentional tools we have to accomplish it, but that’s a subject that would be too long for this already-long post!  

Wrapping things up here.. we appreciate any prayers you’ve said for us and Benjamin & all the cards and gifts that he has received in celebration of his adoption.   Things are going super well, and we are grateful.